accenting the wrong syllable
Since, shame on me, I prefer honesty and directness when dealing with my wormy humanoid brethren, the passive-aggressive among us are my least favorite type of people. Still, I've found a way to make
When someone's annoying me and I don't think it prudent to smash through their grille with my legendary left hook, it's easy to drive them bonkers by accenting the wrong syllable while speaking ... ac-CENT-ing the wrong syl-LA-ble, youknowhamsayin'? If the waitress is giving me attitude, I won't order a cup of cocoa—I'll ask for a cup of co-COA. If someone named Jeremy is wasting my time, I'll say, "Hey, Jer-UH-my, some wea-THER we're having, huh?"
It confuses them to the point of cerebral hemorrhaging, and they're usually too timid to ask whether I'm doing it on purpose. And if they do, I just deny it.
Try it on someone you despise. You'll have so much fun, you'll never want to pronounce things correctly again.
