upset about yesterday's photo, goad opts for "more-attractive" headshot
Jim Goad spent most of last evening in bed, curled tightly in the fetal position and howling about how "weird" and "unattractive" yesterday's candid bathroom photo made him look.
"It's just...hideous," he sobbed in between hearty bites of his screamingly homo vanilla lo-carb "rice cream," confiding to me that he wishes he'd never posted the offending photo. "My mouth is hanging open like I'm some kind of retard, I have this weird ham-roll thing going on with my forehead, my nostrils are abnormally prominent, and in real life, my shoulders are much beefier than that. It simply doesn't do me justice."
When I admitted that I hadn't read his website yesterday, we rushed from the bedroom into the living room and called it up on his computer. When I saw the photo, I instantly agreed—it failed to capture his smoldering sensuality, epitomized by his patented "steely grey eyes," which are at once menacing and captivating.
We snapped over fifteen hundred shots as Goad sat in front of his computer. After a few hours of deliberation, Goad finally chose the image you're looking at now. "I really don't want people to think I look like the less-attractive shots of me, because I don't," Goad reasoned as we hastily uploaded the newer, comelier jpg to his server. "I want them to know the truth, which is that I look like the more-attractive ones."
